Released:
September 22nd, 2018
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Description:
If you ask me, foolishness is like beauty - all about the eye of the beholder.
For instance - I’ve been told the amount of caffeine I consume on a daily basis will eventually kill me, which makes no sense, because that caffeine is essential to living. Then I have doctors telling me that I need to get more sleep if I want to live a happy, healthy life. I can easily refute those claims, because my life is neither happy nor healthy if I don’t utilize every possible second of each day to ensure my life’s goals are met.
Now I’ve got people claiming that hooking up with the sexy bodyguard I hired after someone tried to kill me in broad daylight is a mistake. And, okay, they might be right about that one. Even I can’t argue that it’s not healthy to sleep with someone you can barely stand to be around outside the bedroom.
But you know what? Life is already short enough. If there’s a chance I might die young, then I’m going to go out with a bang - preferably the kind that comes with an orgasm or twelve.
Released on July 11, 2017.
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Forget apps, websites and singles events - clearly the best way to meet a guy is to move in next door, accidentally assault him and then demand a job at his company.
If that kind of charm doesn’t totally knock him off his feet, the next step is to build an army. If possible, try to recruit those closest to the target, such as his mom, sisters and closest friends. Sure, it sounds extreme and maybe a little bit crazy, but I’ve always subscribed to the old adage “No one worth having comes willingly.” Okay, I switched out some words there, but you get the point.
Caution: Even the most foolproof plans can have hiccups along the way. I’ve taken the liberty of compiling a list of things you should watch out for: Crazy ex-boyfriends who pop up out of nowhere like an evil jack-in-the box; Women who think a strategic nip slip is effective at landing a boyfriend; Co-workers who think it’s hilarious to prank you at work and then upload the videos to social media.
Still have doubts? No worries. I'll show you how it’s done.
Release date January 20th, 2019
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Ever since I was a little girl, all I ever wanted was to get married. To meet the perfect man who’d love me more than life itself and be a wonderful father to all our beautiful children.
I loaded up on chapstick and prepared myself for all the frogs I’d have to kiss to find my prince. But I hadn’t been prepared for just how slimy and gross those metaphorical amphibians could be. And as I got older, the toads got hornier and hornier. (No pun intended, but we’re talking men here, so… yeah.)
Still, I refuse to give up, no matter how many obstacles are thrown my way.
Liam, however, has other plans for my future.
Every inch the bad boy with his leather jacket, dark eyes and tattoos, you’d never expect his personality to be more along the lines of class clown. The combination is oddly sexy. Just ask any woman of legal age in the city of New York, since he’s likely slept with all of them by now.
A simple misunderstanding made us enemies. Now I can’t get rid of him. He’s like a bad case of herpes that just keeps flaring up at the worst of times. And if he sabotages one more of my dates, I’m going to kill him. Or kiss him.
Most days I can’t decide which I’d rather do more.